2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
My experience has nothing to do with converting, reverting, or changing my faith. This experience is simply showing me a bigger part of God. Showing me a more intimate way to worship him. It is showing me once and for all that we are set apart.
Once I was introduced to the idea, at first, I was against it. I thought head coverings were for only Muslim women. I couldn’t understand why my “hair” needed to be covered, or what that had to do with modesty. I too was just like others who had not did their research. After researching, and after actually experiencing a spiritual awakening, I began to understand a bigger concept.
Not only has wearing a head covering agreed with my spirit, it has taught me a lesson as well. To not be focused on what you look like. Who are you trying to impress? Who cares if your hair is straight, curly, or shiny? God doesn’t!
I have never fit in. For as long as I could remember. My earliest memory of conforming to please others was in the 9th grade. My first love, my heart, told me that my feet were too big to wear tight legged jeans. So, right after that I remember telling my momma that I no longer wanted to wear tight legged jeans. I needed boot cut! I was dead set on it. I always knew my feet were big, but when “he” made a comment about them, I knew I had to fix it. I wanted to be pretty for him. Even if that meant hiding my big feet.
I have always stood out. I’ve never been like most others my age. I’ve never liked the things they liked, or did the things they wanted to do. I’ve been the odd ball of a group. This, in addition to a low self esteem, led to constantly feeling like an outcast. Not realizing God had a place for me. He had a plan in motion. I’ve constantly felt as though I had to explain myself. What I am doing, how I dress, and even what I believe. Everyone has had a turn to judge, gossip, and cast their opinions onto me and my life. I’ve always allowed it. I allowed their words to tear me down, to make me second guess myself. To make me believe that it may in fact be something “wrong” with me.
That’s until 2 weeks ago when I started covering my hair. Believe it or not, me changing myself, to make myself stand out, made me even more confident. And the ultimate reason why is because I knew WHY or for WHO I was doing it for. To simply be closer to God. Being the outcast, having a low self esteem, plus cursed with the constant desire to be loved, have all led to this confident me that I am today.
A More Confident Me
I no longer CARE what others think. Nor care who loves me. God’s view and God’s love is all that I’m interested in. It’s so amazing how I’ve already changed in this short time. This experience has been the life lesson that I’ve longed for. Once I placed a covering over my head it was me cutting off all things that didn’t matter. It was me being reborn. I so needed that rebirth. I felt as though I was spiritually dying. My bouts of depression seemed to come closer and closer together. I prayed so hard for God to just give me something. Give me joy, change me! And oh how he did just that! From the inside out…
Placing a covering over my head erases thoughts of self and the world and draws my attention to WHO is ABOVE. In agreeance to the Word, head coverings are showing submission to God and acknowledging your position in Him. In addition, it serves as a helpful reminder, every second, to be in communion with him.
1 Timothy 2:9
And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and
appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix
their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes. 10 For women who
claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do.