Following Christ · Relationships

Location to Truth: Finding My Flaws

Lisa Nichols’ article Set Yourself Free published last year in Essence Magazine, was just the truth I had been looking for.This article is summation to what I’ve been feeling and answers the question to what next steps I should take to get my spirit inline with my future. It has put the ME that I am into perspective.

Majority of the time our truth is right there. The answers. The comfort. What you have needed as a re-boost to your inner spirit. Sadly, this article has been sitting on my night stand for almost a week and a half. My hun bun sent it to be because he knew I needed it. I don’t think he realized just how much.  I’ve been having a rough couple of days and began to pray for a good word … God led me to finally finish reading the article. Nichols stepped all on my toes  and made me realize a few of my flaws:

  • I haven’t forgave.

“To shed the invisible shackles that keep you from being your best, you also have to forgive—yourself or others.”

  • I’m holding myself back spiritually from growth. I’m stifled by self-pity instead of using it as a stepping stone.

“Whatever the conversation going on in your head, don’t hold your future hostage to your past experiences.”

  • I’ll never be able to move on to true love because I’m focused on my past hurts.

“If we don’t sit still in awareness long enough to absorb our lessons and make peace with our past, we will simply slingshot back like a rubber band to the same hurt again and again, year after year.”

I love him for sending this to me. Despite our distance, he has come to know me so well. Unfortunately, I see issues that are arising in our relationship because of my past. The rubber band effect. I told him I won’t ever trust him because I no longer trust anyone. When bad things happen I dig up old hurt to attach right along with it. Constantly reminding myself of past tears and past setbacks. I’ve let everyone in and now refusing entry to the one that deserves it…

“Your job going forward is to stay fully conscious of the baggage you bring from the past.”

And the most damaging flaw:

  • I’m not seeing ME for who I truly am or MEANT TO BE.

“We each have to excavate the internal scripts we have lived in for the last two, five or ten years and then say, It’s time to release these limiting beliefs about myself so I can step into my true brilliance.”

For so long I have not let God be the author of my character. Everyone else was given the pen to write my story and tell me how to act out my scene. No thoughts for myself, no freedom to be who I wanted to be. But that was my fault. I’m now taking back all creative rights and placing them back in God’s hands.

Psalm 139:14

14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous — and how well I know it.

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4 thoughts on “Location to Truth: Finding My Flaws

  1. Gosh, this is such a good post. I struggled with this very same thing. Past relationships can be so damaging and it’s tough for us to see ourselves as God sees us…beautiful and complete in Him.

    May I recommend a book? Captivating by John and Stasi Eldridge it is about healing wounds in our hearts and drawing close to the heart of God. Me and some girlfriends just read it in our relationship book club in March. I pray it blesses you.

    1. Thank you so much. I believe issues with past hurts are more common than a lot of us let on. I will definitely check out that book.

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